New Items.....YAY!

I just loaded this up at my shop on Etsy....you can go directly there through this link http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33144095

ok....this is a new Steel Grey Glass Pearl and Chain Necklace.....it is very pretty.....perfect for prom or just a fun night out!

I am out for now....going to the library to get some books on Multiple Sclerosis....ain't life grand?

WHY?? (mature content)

Ya know...over the past few years I have had to endure quite a bit of medical ... medical....well medical hell I guess. After suffering for all those years with headaches...then they do the brain surgeries. I thought I was done.
SO I begin to write a book about what a wonderful childhood I had. Ya...that is in italics for a reason. Sarcasm and disdain! Growing up a Callahan is no treat....let me tell ya. I had an abusive Mother. Who was never around...and when she was...she was emotionally vacant...or so angry I was her punching bag. A step-father who has....well we will just call them "boundary issues" When he was called to the counselors office when I was in the 7th grade he just said he "Was just showing me he loved me like one of his own daughters" Well....they sure were lucky that they lived elsewhere.
So when does the misery end? My ummm well let's just call her Linda...she isn't a mother by any means of the word. She loved to take her daily aggressions out on me. Not my younger sister...Nooooo Kim was the "perfect daughter" or should I say....."the beautiful daughter" That is after all....how she introduced us.
"This is my daughter Chris...and this is our beautifullll daughter Kim" talk about feeling like crap. Then whoever she was introducing us to that time would look at me like I had fleas. Or perhaps it was a dog's face they expected. I'll never know.
Then the greatest part of it was....Kim could do no wrong. If she forgot to clean Linda and Gordon's bathroom....for some reason it became my fault. If the 2 cans of chili were missing....it was my fault. No, never Kims. Sitting there stoned out of her mind on the hash that the kid Steve up the street gave to her wrapped up in foil. Nope....I too had to take the blame for that.
So after years of separate Christmas's....birthdays....you name it. Linda would have us come to her house in stages. That way...Kim and whoever she was married to at the time would come out and open hundreds....and I am not over exaggerating HUNDREDS if not thousands of dollars of gifts....my girls and I would be "allowed" to come out to her house. The girls would each get one gift....a gift card...meanwhile their cousin Jordan was in the other room having a temper tantrum because he can't decide on which gaming system to play first...his new Nintendo 64 or the Playstation that "Grammy and Papa" just gave him for Christmas. You could see the gifts stacked in the back of Kim's SUV...of which Linda and Gordon also bought for her....and me? Ha...I would get the slippers re-gifted to me that someone gave to Linda the previous Christmas or her birthday in November. It was always such a lovely time.
So after all this....years of abuse of a family....a sick and twisted Mother....that would rather be snorting nasal spray....and telling us she was at work until 11:00 at night. A step-father that couldn't keep his nasty old hands and lips off of me and my best friend....he would wrestle us on the bed...tickling in spots that an old man's hands just didn't belong. We were 14 and 15....what business did he have in my room?
I absolutely HATED Thursday nights. They would go bowling. Them being gone was great. Don't get me wrong. It was when they got home. A few drinks...and Linda would head to the shower....and Gordon would decide to corner me in the hallway or the kitchen. Or next to the shelves on which the stereo and some other crap sat. He was out of line in ways I won't go into detail.
This went on for years. Linda hated me my whole life. Still does. Not until my brain surgery did it finally dawn on me. She knew what was going on....she knew it all along. She was jealous. Jealous that her husband wanted younger women. Like the one I caught him with one morning at the Days Inn. His excuse....she was just a "very nice waitress" eeyyyaaaaa....bet she got a great tip too.
Soooooo why all this now? Why am I spewing old dirty laundry? Because after hurting for the past 20+ years and having doctors tell me I was crazy....after Linda telling me to "get over it and move on" after all of this....I go through 2 brain surgeries for a brain malformation....of which could have been a birth defect...or from the trauma of one of Linda's beatings. The worst part of those times is...the neighbors that I run into these days...still remember hearing them all. They all remember them. I am actually writing a book about all of this. Linda and Gordon actually have the nerve to tell me and anyone that will listen that they will sue me. HA....can't sue me for the truth. They have been telling ANYONE that will listen..."well....our friends knowww the truth" THAT'S RIGHT! They do....who do they think is helping me write the book??? I mean seriously....they are the laughing stock of this town.
Now that I have been told I have Multiple Sclerosis....I am going to be letting everyone know what they are. They will tell you they are pillars of the community....blah blah .... they are evil. Linda is a witch...and Gordon is a pedophile. I only pray that he never did to my sister Kim what he did to me.
I don't know how much time I have left. But....let them sue me.....by the time it get's to court....and the appeals process....I don't know how much of me will be left.....
My step sisters and my step brother.....I think that sometimes they wish they had been able to grow up with Gordon. I tell them that they are lucky. If they only knew. But....how do I tell them their own Father is a letch. He would tell me...."It's the Fathers job to teach his daughter how to make love" NO IT ISN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He would tell me about his penis size.....and then I would be beaten by Linda when she got home....for something I had nothing to do with. So GOD...why? WHY?
I have tried so hard to be a good person for my whole life. Ya...I have screwed up...I have screwed up A LOT! But I have asked for forgiveness......why do I have to suffer the surgeries....the pain.....and now a life with M.S.
Social Security has denied me. Say that I am able to work. I can't sit for longer than a 20 minute period.....if I stand too long I pass out. I run into walls.....I can't feel my fingers half the time. We have sold everything we can. We are barely hanging on to our home. My poor husband works his ASS OFF....to take care of me and our family. But Kim....my sister. Linda bought her a $300,000 home. Pays her bills. Takes Jordan School shopping and gives him money hand over fist. If Kim needs anything....Linda gets it for her. And us???? We actually make every house payment......we pay each and every medical bill that the insurance doesn't cover....we are good people. We are in the 3rd row at church each Sunday. So God....what am I doing wrong???? Why am I being punished...and my family being punished because of me????? Why.....I pray and I talk to you all the time. I read the bible....I try to be the best person I can. I have lived a life of Hell on earth....and I don't understand why Social Security won't help me....we don't qualify for any help on our mortgage....the reason WE HAVE MADE EVERY PAYMENT that is the reason they give us. We aren't like hundreds....noooo THOUSANDS of others who just let the medical bills go to the wayside...and figure why bother paying them.....OURS are paid. And not in payments either.....IN FULL. When I worked....I loved working.....I brought home damn good money working in the medical field. Then one day .... I get the boom lowered by the doctors.
"You can never work again" but does Social Security care? NO....when does it end? When does the hurting stop....? What did I do God? Why me? Please God...show me the way out of this living hell. I have been in it since child hood. This isn't fair to my family. When I worked...we had money in savings....we had money in the bank. If the girls needed something....ANYTHING....we could do it. We helped out friends with money. We gave and gave and helped. Now...we have nothing left to sell. Just this weekend....my husband sold his 72 Torino. That his Father and Mother bought in the latter part of 1971. He sold his memories for me. He sold his family trips. His prom night. He sold a lifetime of his family memories....for what.....to pay my medical bills. How fair is this to him? He sold his truck....we have sold everything we can GOD.....PLEASE. Show me or tell me....something.....please. I know that you have a divine life planned for us. I know that the plan you have for my life is full of grace and glory. But when? WHEN?
I survived the beatings of Linda Callahan....I survived Gordon Callahans advances....I survived the brain surgeries....I have survived abusive partners.....I will survive M.S. Because I am strong. I am strong in the Lord....I just want to know why....why me? I will remain strong in the Lord.....I will continue to pray. I will be at church next Sunday....singing and praising with the person next to me....my husband Steven. The one thing.....besides our daughters, in this lifetime of mine....that hasn't tried to hurt me...but has made me who and what I am. A strong woman. A giving person. A loving person. A person who cares about the elderly....the hurting....the hungry....and the helpless. Because I guess at the end of the day.....when all is said and done. I might think that my life is hard....but someone else....always has it harder. Maybe my purpose here....is to just be there for them...to pray....so for now. I will go and pray for those that have it worse than I do.

Sorry for my rant.....

I think I figured it out!

Sigh…..here we are. October 2, 2009, again…already? Really? Where does the time go? Seriously….I remember when I was young. I would hear the adults complaining that “the days were getting shorter” and I remember the comebacks “ya…if there were only more hours in the day” Well, I have given that some thought. IF we were given more hours in a day, we would still complain. Why is that? Well let me tell you what my theory is.
We would still complain about not enough time….or not enough hours to get our things done. Or to complete our never-ending “to do” lists that we all have. Now just because yours might not say “to do” at the top doesn’t mean that you don’t have a list somewhere with things on it that you would at some time….LOVE to get done. You just can’t seem to find the time in the day. Maybe your list is like my husbands. It isn’t even written down anywhere, he can keep it all in his head. I used to be able to do that. Then….my brain just got too full. So now I not only carry around a “to do” list. I carry around a 70 page spiral bound notebook. NO! I am not kidding.
At the top of each page is the day of the week, the date and yup…you got it….I even have to write down which month it is. I can fit 2 months into one of these 10cent jobbers. I keep my appointments listed, things that I need to get done on the computer each day for the shop. The jewelry I want to get done for the shop. Designs I think of. Sites I need to either follow up on, or go check out. And you know what….there hasn’t been one day NOT ONE….that I have been able to cross each and every thing off of a page for that date. Not one. I don’t understand it. I have PLENTY of time during the day. So why???
I get up at 5:30…have my morning coffee with my husband and send him out the door with his bottles of water that I have put his grape propel into. Then it is our youngest daughters turn to go…she is out of here about 6:50. With me standing at the door telling her to “hurry or you are going to miss your bus” and her walking like she has all day. I think she does that to make me nuts…then when she gets around the corner…I would put money on it that she is running.
So the house to myself, I arm myself with my handy dandy spiral notebook and a tall glass of iced tea and head to the office. First it’s the email…and I tell myself EVERYDAY, don’t get distracted…just delete it all. But then there is always that one email that I have to open. Ohhhh mannn there is a link….don’t hit the link….don’t hit the link….don’t….shoot. Page is loading. So then I tell myself…ok self….just click back out of it. But wait…CHECK THAT OUT….ok. So you get the picture here I am sure. So after an hour of trying to get through 30 plus emails and I am not on #8 or so…I realize….time to go and toss in some laundry. While I am grabbing the jeans and shirts to toss into the washer I tell myself…”ok…just go and check the Etsy store. Just do that. Do your forum thing. Relist a few things….list the new stuff…and get out. You have a lot more to do today on there….don’t blow it….again”
Back to the computer….type in http://beadedindulgences.etsy.com/ ok…so far…so good. Sign in. Ok…doing good. Just keep on the path. Go to “your etsy”…check a few things…and then off to the forum….just to see if there are any good topics or new bugs with the system today. In forums…..hmmm let’s see….where to pop into today??? Ahhhh another “newbie” needing help. I will go in there. I still need help with all this stuff too. Ohhh Wait….they are fighting in this one…calling out….I don’t want to read all this mean stuff…(click pg 3) man they are really going after someone. I can’t believe they are being sooooo rude. Page 5…I will go and look and see what else is going on. Then you notice….ohhhhh what a cute avatar she has….click on that one and your off to the races. WELLL this is a veryyyy cute shop. Wow…..I will heart her…hmmm wonder who she has sold to….
See where I am going with this? So by the time I finally realize my buzzer on my dryer is going off for the 3rd time…and I should be wellllll past my Etsy business….I have yet to make it to Destash Junction…or CoiffuresCommunity….or WeLoveEtsy or one of the twenty other spots I need to check on….or go and see what is on sale at my favorite suppliers…ohhh that reminds me SweetGeorgiaBeads @etsy.com has the best deals….go in and check her out again. Then I start to compare her prices with others….so when I do have the money…I know I am going to her anyway….so why do I bother comparing??? I dunno. Is this human nature….or Adhd??? Or just bad time management? I wasn’t like this until the brain surgeries. Dang Chiari Malformation.
I used to be a Medical Assistant. I worked with Doctors and Specialists. I loaded people into ambulances and the dang helicopter. Held the knife sticking out of a mans belly while the police questioned the wife….and the man with the metal rod through his neck….had to hold his neck still until ambulance arrived because we were out of C-collars and I was scared to death that if he even sneezed…that metal was going through his Carotid Artery. Oh…and I delivered a baby in a Toyota pick-up truck in the middle of a blizzard in our parking lot. They were on their way to the hospital…and couldn’t make it. The best part of that was….the Doctors left me alone to it. They ran back and forth into the building to GET ME what I needed for the patient…while I brought this little tiny baby boy….who they named Kevin into the world. Did I mention they didn’t speak a word of English….I couldn’t figure out why she wouldn’t answer me at first…lol.
So ya know….I used to be someone. I was someone important. Now I am just me. Trying to make jewelry on the side because, after my brain surgeries was told that I could never work again. Matter of fact. I am being sent to UC Davis for 2 weeks so they can do testing and all kinds of other junk to me. Maybe after I get home….I will be able to manage my time better. Once upon a time I was Employee of the Month…of the Quarter…for a very large hospital. I was someone. What I did mattered. Now…I am just…. me. One day I was making great money. Now I am just trying to teach myself to make jewelry to sell online…to try and help my husband pay for my medications. Maybe when I get back from UC Davis I will be able to remember things again….I guess I didn’t mention…the reason I carry the spiral notebook…is due to short term memory loss. I have to write everything down….because I don’t remember what I do week to week. I have another notebook to write down where I put things….I can never remember where I put things. Especially important things.…only problem is….I lost that notebook. And no, I am not kidding. Well…I guess I figured out my time management issues. What are some of yours?

Sunday Sundayyyyyy

This is supposed to be the day that our family hangs out together and just does some serious "chillaxin'" but nope....not today.
My daughter got called in to her job. Then hubby got asked to go and help our son-in-law out with a fair going on at the Catholic Church in town. They are having a big carnival and needed extra help with the rides for the children who go to school there. Sooooo here I am.....home....blogging.
I guess I shouldn't complain. Steve (hubby) and our youngest daughter Tay who still lives home with us....and myself....we all got to go to church together at least before everyone had to go and do their own thing. So I am thankful for that.
I just remember the days when the girls were younger. I think as parents we all go through this.
We would wonder....when will they start doing things for themselves.....when will they do this....or that. Or move out.....and then they move out....and we miss them. Then they move back home. And we begin to wonder again. What was I thinking? When is she moving back out? lol I remember years ago just wanting some time for myself....but now when I do get it....I want everyone home.
Is it just me????? Is this normal???? lol
I would love to hear some feedback on this subject.
Wellllll.....I guess I will go and play with my copper wire I got a week or so ago. I have already made some cool looking things. I can't wait until I am good at this. I love the wire....and the beads. SOOOO I guess I will take my own advice that I always give at the end of my blog...and I think that since my family is all out doing what they want to for the day....that I will now also....go and do what I love!

Newest Listings

Ok...wow....I don't know where the time truly goes.
I keep a notebook...and at the top of each page is the date. Down the left hand side are the things I need to get done that day for the shop....ie: new listings on Etsy....go to CoiffuresCommunity and update...go to WeLoveEtsy and update...then to DestashJunction....and the list goes on. I also ALWAYS have on that side....BLOG...and do my HUB pages. Geeeze.
Now....down the right hand side....kinda mid page I'd say. Are the things I would like to go and check out...ie: new sites I have heard of in the forums...or on one of my web link emails I get daily.
So as you can see....I begin my day around 6-6:30 a.m with good intentions. By 11:00-ish I realize that smell isn't coming from outside....and I need to shower. (not that bad...but you get the point) So I go in and take care of business there. I don't know why I bother with the makeup and doing my hair...it isn't like Publishers Clearing House is knocking on my door today or anything. But...we are women....it's just what we do. That is what I tell my husband anyway.
He...the husband...get's home around 3:00. I decide to migrate away from the computer that I have again been at since around noonish.....and begin to weed through all the wire and the beads and my idea pages to figure out what I am going to work on today...if there isn't already something in progress.
Just when I am getting somewhere with what I am working on....and this is always inevitable I hear the familiar sound of "Honey, dinner is ready" grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr whisper to myself....can't you see I am WORKING!! He is home for the day....his day is done.....grumble grumble....
So after dinner.....it is onto the couch next to him.....he is falling asleep and I am working on the latest and greatest items I am attempting to fenagle my way through. As he is napping soundly....I run back to the office to check email again....ya just never know!
Around 8:oo hubby wakes up...."what's on t.v honey?" my reply is typically....uhhhh dunno....working on this.
Now....some nights I can get away with working past 8...but that is what he had decided my quitting time is....or I would work until midnight.
Wellllll.....last night....taking my hair out of the twisted band around what I will swear was at one point of the day a pony tail type,....well...whatever thing. There was a POP in my right shoulder. So guess what.....I had to hear a lecture for almost an hour about how NOW my quitting time is WHEN HE GETS HOME AROUND 3. How fair is this???? Because my arm is hurting...he seems to think that I am working it too hard.
Men don't understand. Well...I shouldn't say MEN...there are women out there too that are like this. It isn't that he isn't supportive of what I am trying to do. It is because I have already had so many dang surgeries....he is worried I will injure myself doing this. But how do you go from working day in and day out....12 hour days....to having a team of Doctors tell you that you are never working again. Ok...ya....my jewelry that I make takes me a lot longer than the average designer. I don't care about that. I do get it done....eventually. I know now that if a project says "Complete it in an hour" I know this will be a day long deal for me. I have come to grips with this. BUT to not understand that I can't sit still all day.....and as he told me last night....DO NOTHING BUT WATCH TELEVISION....are you joking???? SERIOUSLY???
....WOW......I got way off track....lol lol lol.....
I was coming on to show you my latest additions.LOLLOLOLOL....
Ok...here ya go.......

These are one pair of the Breast Cancer Awareness Earrings I have made to gear up for the month of October. I think the HOPE charms truly add a little something special to these. So when wearing these...your not just showing your support to breast cancer sufferers and their family and friends...your showing HOPE.
































This anklet/bracelet to the right>>>>> is a new
piece that I made this past week. It has three
different colors of teeny tiny glass pearls. There is the darkest color that I am calling Gunmetal and then the middle grey is a Steely color grey. The lightest grey is so light that in bright brightttt light it almost looks white. There are Montana Blue Sapphire Swarovskis in 6mm and 4mm intermixed with some silver chain and silver spacers. It will go from approx 9"-11" with extender chain. Kinda cooool huh?



AND THESE.....What do ya think???? These are my latest earrings that I just finished. It took me a week and a half to complete these between designing them...and figuring out what would and wouldn't work....a lot of trial and error....stuff flying across the room lol
These are my new Bohemian Earrings I just listed. I used Antique Brass chain, ear wires and the twisted hoops are antique brass as well. The top topaz bead is a czech crystal faceted bead. The bottom is a smooth round periodot green bead. the beads dangling off of the chain are both Swarovski bi-cones the green is the periodot color and the topaz have an a/b finish. (auroreau borealis) So they have this amazing shimmer to them.
I actually was pleasantly surprised with these. I love them. They are 4" long from the bottom of the ear wire...so I think these are actually considered "shoulder sweepers" or something like that.
Well.....I have more on my left side of my list I have to get done. Not to mention my daughter is taking me to town for a bit. Boy....gotta love Fridays huh?
Alright....talk to you all soon......so for now.......GO AND DO WHAT YOU LOVE!!!!

Finally....

For the longest time I have admired those that have the talent to make anything with wire. Especially Jewelry....wire weaving....wire wrapping....wire ANYTHING. So...I am now a member of CoiffuresCommunity and some of the members over there are nothing short of AMAZING.
They have this tremendous talent that makes me sooooo want to be able to do that. You can see their work at the site http://coiffurescommunity.com/ there are many many talented people there. Oh...and if you are a jewelry artisan.....you should look into signing up. Pam...the gal that started all of this is an amazing person. She is very friendly and personable. I love it there.
Wait...where was I???? Oh ok...soooo a few weeks ago I saw a wire cross and thought to myself. That's it....that is what I want to make first. So I searched and searched and SEARCHED for the tutorial or instructions to do this. I found a lot of tutorials...but nothing was really very close to what I had in mind. I knew what it was I wanted to make....but I couldn't find anything even resembling what I had in my head.
I pulled out a bunch of wire right around the same time I was hunting for the DIY link I thought I could find....every night...I would pick up the wire....and play with it....and then put it back down. I did this every day and night for about a week....FINALLY, with my husband sitting next to me on the couch....and the wire sitting on the little table right in front of me while we watched "Wipeout" on ABC....I just grabbed the wire and told him....that's it...I am just going to go for it. And I did....and here is my first wire wove-wrapped up cross. I used Swarovski bi-cone crystals also....let me know what you think....but be gentle.....I did this without instructions and no net...lol....this is my first shot at this.....

I am going to make a chain to go with it. I know it isn't that great. But hey...at least I just went for it. I am happy at that. I made it. I did it. I had the cuts all over my fingers to show for it too lol.

Well....time to get to making some new items for the shop...I listed a few new ones today. Go check them out at http://beadedindulgences.etsy.com/

See ya later

Wow Time Flies

Wow...I knew it had been awhile since I was able to get on here and blog...but wow...longer than I had thought. Time sure does fly.

Things have been crazy around here at best...but thank goodness....it is getting better. THANK YOU GOD! Ya know...that's another thing....not only do we all let time slip through our hands...but how many times a day do we tell a stranger or someone we love or the person at the store Thank You...in comparison with the One that is responsible for all of us being here. I have given it a lot of thought over the past 2 years, I think I have come to the conclusion that it is when we do forget to tell God Thank You...that he kinda pulls us back...or tosses something at us to get our attention. If you think about it...it makes sense. Why is it that when we are in a tight spot...or something happens to a loved one...or you are having a tramautic episode in your life...that we pray? But when was the last time that everything in your life was going perfect...I mean...you were completely satisfied with everything in every aspect of your life...that you prayed to God...just to say Thank You? I know I am trying to be better about it myself...it is hard. We do forget to Thank God when things are good....but I for one am tired of always praying when things are bad. So from now on...I am going to Thank God everyday....every time I think of it during the day....and pray about good things that he is doing and has done for me and my family...instead of always praying to ask for help with a situation....I bet...that I will soon find out that it is when you just pray....that God will stop tossing in all the yuck. The tests. The hard parts of life...and when we begin to just pray.....because we are thankful....and grateful....only wonderful things will happen.

I think I will start practicing what I preach.....right now!

Thank you for reading.....please let me know if any of you decide to pray to say thank you....or if you already do...and what changes has it made in your life for you? I would truly love to know.



Until next time....and I won't be this long this time between blogs....because I know that now that I have figured out to pray for the good things....I will have more time to blog....because I will no longer have any yuck! Talk to you all soon!